Deathstalker

One of the more notorious Roger Corman productions is the 1983 film Deathstalker. This was marketed as a swords and sorcery movie but it's a primarily a tits and ass film around a swords and sorcery story with a smattering of weak comedy.

When we first meet "Stalker" he has just met a band of hideous looking men (monsters?) who are trying to steal the loot, and kidnapped woman, off a thief. Stalker kills all the monster-men, then thief, and then tries to force himself on the woman. Over the course of the film, he calls himself Stalker and others call him either Stalker or Death Stalker.

The title character is not morally ambiguous, he's morally odious. To call him an "antihero" would be a whitewashing of the term. The exploitation is thick, every woman under 30 in the cast is there to show skin. The named two women stars were best known at the time for modeling, one in Playboy. The other, Lana Clarkson, only really became famous with this role. (Later she would marry Phil Spector and be killed by him.)

The story is weak, the special effects so-so, the costumers emphasizing the beefcake of the male stars and sex appeal of the female. But the camerawork is good and the stars are good to look at.

In 2025, a remake has come out. This one is executive produced by Slash (of Guns'n'Roses fame). The cast is much smaller, and no one flashing tits or ass. This time it is clearly a swords and sorcery comedy.

Here we meet Deathstalker, an ex-military man who now is an independent thief looting battlefields, and finishing off some of the wounded for their bounty. Later in a bar, the patrons talk of him and share his name with the audience.

The story has some vague similarities, but most specifics differ. The cast is a lot smaller, and the sets are not as impressive. The new one has a lot of good practical effects, a rarity in this day and computer age. For all of the lack of actors, this wastes no opportunity for a good practical detail.

The story makes more sense now and Patton Oswald lends his voice to the main comic-relief sidekick. The names of every character except Deathstalker and the witch Toralva differ. In both stories Toralva explains the some magic artifacts and sends Deathstalker on his way.

There's still a plot significant amulet and sword, but in 1983 Deathstalker gets the sword and then looks for the amulet, which the wizard Munkar has. With the amulet, Munkar can't die. With the sword, Deathstalker can't be killed.

In 2025, Deathstalker gets the amulet during his battlefield thievery. He discovers he can't get rid of the amulet and Toralva tells him it goes with whoever killed the last owner. The wizard Necronemnon is out to get the amulet, and is willing to kill for it. Deathstalker needs to find the special sword which is the only thing that can kill the wizard.

The newer movie is a better story, with better creatures. It has a lot more gore than the original and none of the eighties sex excess. It also is a lot smaller.

Deathstalker (2025) at imdb
Deathstalker (1983) at imdb

The Timekeepers of Eternity

In 1995 a miniseries was made from a Stephen King short story, The Langoliers. The miniseries was essentially a three hour movie in two parts, and the DVD release just presented it as such. It's got the usual things that bother me about King, like a character based a bit on himself and a psychic kid. It also suffers from the "we need three hours of content" TV miniseries issue, so the story drags.

The gist of the story is on a red-eye flight from Los Angeles to Boston most of the passengers, and all of the active crew, disappear. The plane continues on autopilot until, a dead-heading captain takes over. A good chunk of the film is the people trying to figure what happened, then some time realizing there's danger, and finally how to undo what happened.

The author stand-in mystery writer provides much of exposition, but it's pretty much all speculation. A self-important and obnoxious businessman provides the name for threat, based on childhood tales his father told while psychologically abusing the kid. One character describes these "Langoliers" as "The timekeepers of eternity" during a bit of padding.

Eventually some of them get back to LAX, and take care to stand out of the way for a safe return to reality, thinking nothing of the huge plane they left right outside the terminal.

That businessman, Mr Toomey, provides a good deal of the conflict when not worrying about the Langoliers. During his attempts to control his emotions he spends the time tearing paper into small strips. This is even used by other characters to recognize Mr Toomey has been around when the torn paper is seen.

In 2021, Aristotelis Maragkos decided to remake the film by reediting the original Tom Holland directed version. Maragkos titled his work The Timekeepers of Eternity and it is more Mr Toomey focused and much tighter, a mere sixty-two minutes.

But the remarkable thing about Maragkos's edit is that it is paper based. He printed the frames, in black and white, on paper and tears and crumples them to fit the story. Split screen edits, for example are archieved with a torn sheet on top of another sheet. The Langolier monsters are no longer mid-budget 1995 CGI "beachballs with teeth", but are now balls of crumpled paper.

(The direction King provided to Holland for the look was "beachballs with teeth". That fits the size, but to me seeming more like walnuts with metal buzz saw teeth. The crumpled paper balls have no visible teeth but seem more intimidating.)

This paper version improves on the original in every way and is an excellent example of experimental film. As a mild spoiler, the ending is different in this one. The film stops before they reach LAX with the implication that they never make it. I believe this is minor since the process and the journey are the good parts. And it's not explicitly said that they don't make it.

The director sells this film, but not on DVD or Bluray, no, you can buy it on used VHS tapes, where the first hour has Timekeepers recorded on top of whatever was there before.

43 million in bond money out of 50 million.

• VHS store version
• Langoliers at Wikipedia
• Langoliers at IMDB
• The Timekeepers of Eternity at IMDB
• The Timekeepers of Eternity trailer at Youtube

Taking Apart a Locking Shopping Cart Wheel

These are old photos from something I did about ten years ago, but I thought I'd share them for people interested.

Some supermarkets around here, in order to combat people walking off with their shopping carts, have wheels that lock when they roll over a line with some sort of short range signal coming out of it. I don't really know the specifics of how the signal is sent.

I've been curious about the anti-theft shopping cart wheels for a while. It's clear that they are radio operated by a signal with a very short broadcast range. Less clear was how they actually stop the wheel from turning. My original hypothesis that the wheel contained a motor which would actively stop the wheel from moving. After finding a wheel that had broken off a cart (honest, I had been watching out for one for several years before finding one; this one was in a Target parking lot), I took it home and opened it up.

It turns out my hypothesis was far off. The center part of the wheel is fixed in place, well anchored to the axle which does not spin. Put another way: the outer part of the wheel moves, but the axle and the inner part do not. When the system receives a signal, it expands a plastic drum brake against the outer rim of the wheel, to prevent the wheel from spinng. When it receives an unlock signal, the plastic drum brake is retracted. During normal operation the only power draw is a small circuit listening for those radio(?) signals. At those times, it then switches on a motor to expand or retract the brake.

This post prompted by learing of begaydocrime.com which has more technical detail and audio files you can play to lock or unlock this sort of wheel.

2025 Modular Film Festival, part 3

Fourth and final post in the 2025 Modular Film Festival series. We begin with day 25 here.

25. A movie 85 minutes long or less
    A Doctor's Sword (2015)

    A quick 68 minutes documentary going back to Japan. Aiden MacCarthy was Irish doctor in the Royal Air Force during WWII. By sheer bad luck, he was a prisoner of war in a camp outside Nagasaki. But he had the good luck to be in an underground bomb shelter on the 9th of August 1945. In the aftermath Dr MacCarthy treated both POWs and the Japanese.

26. Silent film (no audible dialogue) from after 1927
    Steamboat Bill, Jr (1928)

    Just barely past 1927, but I like Buster Keaton and hadn't seen this one.

    It may have been the impetus for "Steamboat Willie" (1928), the first Mickey Mouse cartoon. However the stories are completely different and there's a song ("Steamboat Bill", 1910) they could both be referencing.

    This one is a little slow until Keaton's stunts become the focus in the third act.

27. A Western
    Hell or High Water (2016)

    A neo-Western where the bank robbers are out for justice, the bystanders believe in shooting to kill, and the rangers move slowly and insult each other. And the bank? The bank is after money, of course.

    Excellent acting all around, the two thieves and the two rangers are distinct characters, even if one ranger gets a small part.

    Four branches of Texas Midlands Bank out of five.

28. A movie with practical monsters or creatures
    Jason And The Argonauts (1963)

    Practical effects for creatures and monsters just calls out for Ray Harryhausen. I had seen this film before, but not in several decades.

    Battling a giant statue come to life: check.
    Saved from crumbling rocks by a sea god: check
    Sword fight against a band of skeleton soldiers: check.
    Plus plenty of lessor events.

    And the story's not half bad.

29. A movie based on a comic but not a superhero movie
    30 Days of Night (2007)

    Barrow, Alaska, (changed to Utqiagvik in 2016, but a fictional version anyway[*]) is the farthest north Alaska gets, and has a midnight sun in the summer and no sun at all in winter. A group of vampires decides to take advantage of the night.

    Starts fine, but is a mess by the end.

    [*] Among other problems: Utqiagvik has ~66 days without a sunrise and while Prudhoe Bay is the town with the oil pipeline.

30. The last (or latest) film in a franchise
    Mission Impossible: The Final Reckoning (2025)

    Finally finished this series.

    These just get more progressively ridiculous without reaching Fast and Furious outlandish. Plus as I age I see more and more "the lone man who can save everything" is a specifically fascist fantasy.

    Fun thought: maybe Tom Cruise's Ethan Hunt had a mortal wound along the way and the rest was a "Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" moment-of-death-dream.

So what did I like best about this "festival"?

It spurred me to watch some films I might have never watched (But I'm a Cheerleader (1999), The League of Gentlemen (1960), and The Umbrellas of Cherbourg (1964)) or would have put off watching for a long time (The Iron Giant (1999), Taxi Tehran (2015), and La Jetée (1962)).

Four of those are very worthwhile of your time and other two are worth a watch.

There were some stinkers in the lot, but some of the prompts were seemingly aimed at being stinkers ("A movie that seems fake on Tubi"). Of course, differing tastes always mean someone's good is someone else's bad.

A few had been near the top of my queue and I just worked them into the prompts. Notably Hell or High Water (2016), California Split (1974), and Steamboat Bill, Jr (1928).

I have definite tastes in films, but I do try to deviate from that to see stuff from all eras and genres. This has been an exercise in flexing that diversity.